God, we are yours. Lead us.

We weren't looking.

We don't need any more craziness.

We don't have a clue what to do.

We can't do this without you, God.

This is not our plan.

We don't have the resources for this.

We don't know if we can handle this emotionally.

Why God?  Why now?  Why us?
These have been my conversations and prayers with God this last week.  His response has been so clear, almost audible.  "Because you love me.  Because you are willing.  Because I use people just like you to complete my plan of redemption for others."  To think that God can use us is incredibly humbling.

It was a week ago that Eyerusalem came into the kitchen holding a picture from her past.  She got it when we visited her home in Gerji, almost a year ago now.  She came in crying, and needing to get something off her chest that was so incredibly heavy and difficult to bear.  Something I can't imagine my 12 year old has had to hold in and not think about.   We don't blame her by any means.  We completely understand.

The picture she was holding is of herself at age 5, washing clothes with her mother, father and another little girl, age 3 in a river.  We had asked about the other girl before and we were told that she was a friend.  Now, Eyerusalem wanted to tell us the truth, and that she - is - her - sister.  It is not Mahlet, she was a baby at the time as they are 4 years apart.  As we held her, crying, we began to ask questions and over the course of a couple days we have been able to put together some pieces.

Her name is Meeta.  At about the age of 5 she was kidnapped by some men who knew her father (deceased at the time).  They then sold her to another party.  Her mother tried to search for her for a year, sacrificing food at times to pay for flyers.  We don't know what has happened to her since but about 2-3 years ago, Eyerusalem and her mother saw her one day in the market.   Before anything could be done, she had been whisked into a car and was off again.  So we have reason to believe that she is still alive and is still living in the general area in Addis.

We are heartbroken, for both Meeta and Eyerusalem for carrying this grief with her and living through this.  Mahlet remembers playing with Meeta but not much else.

We don't know what we are doing.  But we need answers.  We trust that God brought this information to us at just the right time for a reason.  We don't know if we will be able to find her or do anything on her behalf but we must try.  We must do all that we can for now.  Even if it is just to bring closure for Eyerusalem and now ourselves.

A co-worker of mine told me that we should just sit back and believe that Meeta is in a good family and is doing well.  We can't play ignorant, nor do we want to.  We have a hole in our hearts now that must be filled.  I was reminded of the parable of the good Samaritan the other day.  The priest and the Levite walked by the wounded man and then the Samaritan came.  He was a hated enemy.  He didn't pretend that he wasn't needed.  He didn't ignore the problem.  He also didn't stop by the man, pray for him, and then leave, promising to keep him in his prayers that maybe God would help him.  No, he took action.
The Bible is full of action takers.  Not people sitting on the sideline watching, praying, wanting to stay in the ignorant bliss, and hoping not to do anything that would cost them too much.

In God's plan for redemption, we are His tools to accomplish His mighty task.  We know that God is, "Father of the fatherless, and protector of widows is God in His holy habitation." Psalms 68:5

We know that He is fully in control.  We trust in Him and His mighty wisdom.  We look for him for direction because we don't know where to go.  We also trust in His comfort because I know that this road that He is asking us to travel down will be a bumpy very difficult road to take.  It will be full of challenges and heartbreak, and we don't even know if there will be anything waiting for us at the end.

We ask for your prayers and support for Meeta, for Eyerusalem and for us as we embark on another journey.  May God be glorified through all we do.  And mark my words, if we find Meeta it will be a true miracle.  If we have the joy of bringing her home one day, it will be another true miracle that can only come from the God of miracles.  

What a year 2012 was

We now step into 2013 and we look forward to what it will bring for our family.  However, as we continue to go forward it is healthy and good for us to look back at how far we have come.  

A year ago we were in Ethiopia fighting to gain custody of our children.  We took custody of our girls on Jan 4th and Yosef a few months later.  Last year, we spent Christmas as a family of five, overseas, visiting our kids for a couple of hours in the orphanage (transition home).  We skyped with family and celebrated a wonderful, different and exciting time.  Fast forward to this last week.  We watched in amazement as our three new children were engaged with their new sisters and other family.  We watched them open presents, and worship God at our Christmas eve service.  

Yesterday, we all shared some of our favorite 2012 memories.  Here are mine for each of them:

My beautiful and amazing wife-  It has been incredible to see her transform into the mother that she is.  Handling three kids was hard, but taking on six of them with their education is a lot to ask.  Heather has done this with grace and wisdom.  I am incredibly proud to have her as my wife and to walk this journey with her.  

Eyerusalem-  My proudest moment of the year with Eyerus came when I was able to baptize her.  Seeing her grow and learn has been nothing less than amazing.  She has come a long ways in the last 12 months.  

Mahlet-  Watching her transition from a very shy, scared, angry little girl into the girl that she is today has been watching a miracle from the inside.  What an incredible transformation we have witnessed.  

London-  I have been incredibly proud as I have watched her learn to read.  It is so fun to snuggle up on the couch with her and have her read a book.  She has also settled into the role of no longer being the oldest incredibly well.  She may not be the oldest, but she will always be the longest.  She is very proud of that.  

Geneva- My favorite memory of her came at the beginning of the year.  We went to visit one of our sponsor children and seeing her heart there was so great to watch.  She gave away a couple of her toys, including her Barbie.  Not just any Barbie, but the one that she had just received for Christmas, her favorite one.  She was telling me about it this week and she still remembered the Barbies name and that her hair changed colors.  She was still happy that she gave it away.  Geneva has an incredible heart for those less fortunate.  

Capri-  We have watched our little girl turn into a big sister this year.  She loves Yosef so much and is his big sister.  She does so well with him and they are best friends.  One of my favorite things of this last year has been seeing her learn how to dress herself, choose her own clothes and do her own hair.  She is probably the funniest girl in our house.  

Yosef-  My favorite time with him came a few months ago.  It was the simple act of running to me to give me a hug as I walked in the door after a 24 hour shift.  He started off this year in the orphanage for the first three and a half months.  He then would only let Heather carry him and wouldn't leave her sight.  He did not like me at all.  Seeing this transition of a bond forming between the two of us has been wonderful.  It has not always been easy, in fact it has been one of the hardest things I have ever done.  

2012 was a year of transformation.  The kind of transformation that can only come by the grace of God, through the Holy Spirit.  We have been incredibly blessed to be a part of it.  We have learned what adoption really means.  We have learned about our own failures over and over again.  We have also learned that even amidst our failures our children still love us and forgive us, but better than that, our God still loves us and forgives us.  

We are looking forward to 2013 as we walk together and continue to see transformation in all our lives, but hopefully with a little less drama and stress.