Family

Yesterday was the first time that Mahlet told Heather, “I love you,” without Heather first initiating it.  Sure, she has repeated it at bedtime and such, but it was the first self-initiated time.  It brought a smile to both of us. 

I have been sitting around for the last couple of weeks letting my ankle heal and I have had lots of time to just sit and watch.  I normally am so busy that I don’t have time to just sit and process things.  The questions that have been streaming through my head have not been easy though.

Would Yosef have made it to his 5^th birthday?

What about Mahlet’s deep hurts?  Would she have any childhood left?

How much longer would Eyerusalem be able to last without her innocence being stolen?  (God thank you for protecting her.)

What about London?  What would her life have been like growing up in the foster care system here in America, lasting in one house for a few months at a time? 

How far have our kids come? 

What was their life like?  I know that they came from a very poor area, (I have been there.)  

Normally, I don’t think of our kids as orphans, or ex-orphans.  They are just our kids. I don’t like to go back to the memories of them as orphans.  It is too hard to do.  This week though, God has been showing me something.  (I am not quite sure what it is but I know that he has been putting something on my heart.) 

God has graciously placed them in our family.  They have comfort in knowing that they have a mom and dad who are at home who love them unconditionally.  They take comfort in knowing that they have siblings to play with.  I am watching them grow up well fed, loved and cared for. 

This week was the first time that I have seen Mahlet play make-believe.  She has never done this before.   She has had no idea how.  She asked for Barbie’s for her birthday a few months ago, but then afterward she wondered why she got them because she didn’t really know how to play with them.  She has never had time for make believe before.  When we were staying in ET, I thought that Eyerusalem and Mahlet would be easily entertained with the long days and I was completely wrong.  London, Geneva and Capri, all knew how to play make believe and entertain themselves for hours playing house, or tea party or flying paper kites.  Mahlet had no idea how to just play. 

Now, I listen to her playing Barbie’s with her sisters, “Okay, I get to be the mom now.  It is okay baby, I love you so much.”  These words mean a lot.  She now remembers what a mother is supposed to be like and she now knows how to love again. 

God, thank you for demonstrating to us what a family is.  Thank you for being our Heavenly Father who cares for the orphans.  You place them in families.  It is by your grace that you have blessed us with our children.  Lord, embolden your church, your people, to provide and care for the millions of orphans that remain.  You are the Father to the fatherless and you bring justice to the orphan.  

Two men, Two continents, One Vision

Thirty two years ago a man was born into a middle class neighborhood in the middle of a suburban city in California.  His parents, both Christians would take him to church weekly.  His dad was a drummer at their church and his mother made sure that we were apart of everything going on at church.  His dad had a solid job and though money wasn't always overflowing, the family never went hungry, and had clothes on our backs.  His mother was able to stay at home and take care of the household.  The family was able to fit into the neighborhood, attending local, public schools as he grew older.  He was able to participate in sports activities freely. This man was able to live a comfortable life growing up.  Sure there were the normal ups and downs but nothing overwhelming.  He was able to get a solid job after going to college for a few years, find a beautiful wife, have numerous children and now has a career as a Fire Captain.

Yes, I am that man.  Born into blessings.  Given the world at my fingertips.

The same year, across the width of this wide world another man was born.  He into vastly different circumstances.  Born into an Orthodox monastery to two blind parents.  His father a monk in the monastery.  His mother being the good Ethiopian woman, taking care of the house and the family.  This man had no public school to go to but did attend a school in the monastery learning about his religion.  It was during this time as a youth, he taught himself how to read, write and speak English using a dictionary.  He grew up in poverty.  It was at the age of 18 that he decided to follow Jesus Christ.  He was then beaten, thrown into a prison where food and water were withheld from him for 3 days.  It was during this time that he was rejoicing in the Lord Jesus.  Tied to the top of a bus, so as to prevent the evil spirits from the inside, he was sent to Addis Ababa.  He entered the capitol city of Ethiopia and was ridiculed as a country boy. Wearing his sheep skin shirt he was send to live in the leper colony, right next to the city dump.  Where the unwanted go.  Daily, he would scavenge the dump for food and items to sell so that he could have money to put himself through high school.  The leper colony, known as Korah was where he established his first church of Jesus followers.  He now has a job as a translator for a guest house.  His name is Bisrat.

Who would ever think that our paths would cross on multiple occasions.  He met us and comforted our anxiety as we went from one guest home to a place unknown, late at night, across the big city of Addis with out 3 kids.  He led us to the church that we were apart of in Korah during our time in Ethiopia, where we were blessed immeasurably.  We were just able to host him as he travels throughout the US.  What an honor it was.  In his words, "Can you believe that a man from the dumps of Addis, is standing on the Golden Gate Bridge right now?  It is amazing.  Simply amazing."

Somehow is God's sovereign grace, He allowed our friend to come to California and stay with us for a few days.  During this time, he was able to help us show our daughter who Jesus Christ is and decide to follow him.  I know that God has ordained the times that we have met.

What if the roles had been changed?  What if it was I who had been born into a monastery, into poverty?  What if he had been born into the wealthiness of America?  Somehow, in God's grace he put each of us into the position that we are in for a reason.  I don't know why.  However, I do now that God has blessed us so that we can in turn bless others.  Everything is His.  Everything.  Whether we have a lot or a little, it doesn't matter.  It is all His.

During his three days here, just about every conversation was centered around Jesus.  It was so refreshing.    We both shared our dreams and visions with each other.  They are the same.  May God be glorified in all that we do, and to see the name of God proclaimed amongst all people groups.

It was difficult to say goodbye but I rest assured knowing that there will be a day when we meet again, whether in this life, or when we are bowing before the Creator of the universe giving Him our praise.

Adopted by the KING!!!

.IDOLS. 

.WITCHCRAFT.

.CHARMS.

These words bring up many images in our heads.  However, for our daughter Eyerusalem they bring up different ones.  Eyerusalem was brought up as an Ethiopian Orthodox.  Ethiopian Orthodox believe that the saints or the virgin Mary hold a special place between themselves and Jesus.  They believe that they need a mediator to Jesus and that they must still work out their salvation through rituals, kissing pictures and fasting. 

The line between Ethiopian Orthodox and Christianity in Ethiopia is hard to distinguish at times.  I have asked time and time again for an explanation into the differences between the religions.  After months in Ethiopia I still felt very vague about how to explain the difference to our new daughter.  To her, she was a Christian.  Yet, something had a grip on her and she was missing it.  She continued to worship pictures.  Even though the differences seemed vague at times I also knew that those who change from Orthodox to Christianity can be severely persecuted for it. 

We have a friend staying with us for a few days from Addis Ababa who used to be Orthodox and now is a Christian, a follower of Jesus.  He has really been able to explain the differences to us and how vastly different they are.  Today, we had him give his testimony to our family during school.  We then asked our kids if they had any questions.  That is when things changed.  Eyerusalem started to ask questions, (and those of you that know her, know that she can ask questions:)  She finally was seeing the difference, seeing the truth.  She was seeing the explanations from her past as lies now.  

She told us that last night while lying in bed, by herself, she decided that she was going to turn from Orthodox and follow Jesus.   We asked her why last night.  She replied that we had been going through a book on peoples of the world in school that day and we briefly talked about witches, charms, idols, etc.  It wasn’t even a two-minute conversation but that didn’t matter.  (This is a major plus in homeschooling our kids:)  Lying in bed she realized that she had idols, she realized that she had charms, and she realized the witchcraft that had been a part of the religion. 

She wanted the truth. 

She knows that Jesus is the Truth.  She knows that He and only He can stand between herself as an imperfect sinner before a Holy and Righteous God. 

What an amazing time for her and our family to talk through these things and clearly see how the Spirit of God has been working in her. 

So we asked her what to do with her idols?  Burn them was the answer.  So with a big bonfire and some fanfare we burned her idols.  (I can’t even believe that I am typing this, it is so incredible.)  As she threw them in the fire she was reciting that Jesus is the way, the ONLY way. 

We discussed many different passages and decided that she needed to be baptized to confirm the decision and make a bold statement that she is going to follow Christ as her Savior now. 

 

With a couple of hours to prepare, we invited our family, and senior pastor to come to our house and join us for a baptism tonight.  We threw a celebration because it is worthy of celebrating!  I am honored that I was able to get into the water with my new daughter and baptize her.  What a blessing.  Having our friend stay at our house this week has been another incredible blessing that we are ever grateful for. 

Praise God, as Eyerusalem’s journey of adoption has now been completed through her adopted status as a daughter of the KING.  

Finding Normal in a Pair of Slippers

When we first thought about bringing three new kids into our home, I tried to "prepare" myself.  I prayed (A LOT:), read books, talked to parents of preteens, went shopping, practiced (very little of:) the language, took adoption classes geared towards adopting older kids, and read blogs of other families who had also adopted older children.  But you know what?  I was completely UNprepared!!!
When we stepped off that airplane, and landed back onto American soil, I was TERRIFIED.  You see, I had lived in Ethiopia with my six kids for FOUR months!  During those four months I had some hard days.  But I also had live in help!  I had staff on hand 24 hours a day who could speak to my (new) kids if there was ever a language break down, or simply to knock some sense into them:)!
Most people say it takes a good six months to a year to really feel like things are "normal".  Each of my kids are getting there at different times.  Mahlet had the roughest start, but since getting over that initial (horrible:) first couple of months, she has been "normal".  Like, in a good way.  The kind of normal where I constantly feel like I have memories of doing something with her, but I haven't.  I guess that is what people mean when they say "it's like she's always been here".  That's how it feels with Mahlet.  She is spunky, smart, funny, and her cute little accent makes me smile.
Yosef was a little harder.  He joined the family a few months later than his sisters, and he was clingy and scared for the first three months we had him.  I carried him around most days, and he cried whenever I wasn't in his line of site.  Whenever Adam walked into the room, he cried, clung to me, or left the room.  He was terrified of Adam.  He had never had a man in his life, EVER, much less a dad!  Life with Yosef is getting easier.  He gets SO excited when I come home from the store.  I love listening to him say "MOMMY!!!!!!" as he comes running to me giggling.
Eyerusalem was even harder:).  She was perfect the first month.  Everything that came out of her mouth was polite.  She never talked back, and she was always helpful.  Then the "honeymoon" as they call it, wore off:).  She is your typical preteen, fully equipped with mood swings, hormones, and an attitude!  We have proof that it doesn't matter what language you speak, or what culture you are from, every preteen knows how to roll their eyes and say "WHATEVER!" when they are unhappy.  Falling in love with a hormonal preteen has been the most challenging thing I have ever done.  There have been days when I have wondered why God called me to this.  Wondered if I wasn't doing a good enough job.  But then, something happened.  I can't explain what exactly.  But then this week, Eyerusalem and I bonded over a pair of slippers.  She loves to crochet.  She is really good at having an idea in her head, and creating that idea with her hands.  I am definitely not a crocheter, and I don't even feel like I am a visionary like she is.  Somehow though, together, we managed to help her figure out how to make a pair of slippers.  Sure, she made plenty of mistakes along the way.  She got frustrated and wanted to give up.  But then I would give her a new idea, and she would get inspired all over again to finish the job.  And she did!  She made herself a pair of slippers!  She was so excited, and she thought I was the one who told her how to do it!  The funny thing is though, she is the one that did it.  All I did was talk her through it.
So, I guess I am learning what my role to a preteen is.  I am not supposed to do it for her, or even tell her what to do.  I am just supposed to guide her, and help her learn how to make her own decisions.  Sure, she'll make mistakes along the way, but that's all part of growing up.  I think the change in my heart, is that I WANT to be there for her when she makes those mistakes, to be that someone she can come to and talk it through.  I finally feel like my life is starting to find normal with all SIX of my kids:)!

Trauma of a toddler

Many days will go by now when we hardly remember that three of our kids spent almost a year in an orphanage.  It is not something that we dwell on, even though the effects of it will rear their ugly heads every now and then.

Sundays are always hard for us.  Very hard.  It is not easy getting everyone out the door by 8:15 am so that we can get to church.  It is even harder when often I, Adam, don't get off work until 8am some Sundays.  We are often gone all day, doing church activities and thus have a need to bring at least breakfast for the road, a picnic lunch and sometimes sandwiches for dinner as well, causing hours of preparation.  I won't even get into the shower and hair situation that develops every Sunday morning with 5 girls:)

Yosef has a very hard time going into the toddler class.  We knew that he would, and that he would spend many Sundays hanging out with us.  So this last Sunday I was walking the hallways with him for 45 minutes just hanging out.  He was carrying around his baby doll.  (Yes a baby doll, remember all those sisters?) He actually uses it as a chew toy.  He was following me wherever I went, giving high-fives to those that passed by.  He was peaceful, happy and content.

I asked him if he was ready to go to his class.  He said, "yes."  So we walked back down the halls to his class.  We got to the door and I asked him if he wanted to go in and play, and again he said, "yes."

It was as I opened the door and he entered the room that things instantly changed for him.

That baby doll that he had been holding close to his chest, became a weapon.  He used it to swing around as far as he could reach.  He wasn't trying to hit anyone in particular but definitely was creating a space for himself.  If any other kid wanted to come close to him they would get into "his" space and thus get hit by the doll.  It was an instinctive protection that he has developed.  It was something that I saw many children do over and over again in the orphanage.  It was hard to watch, as I remember watching him do the same thing back in Addis.  He didn't want to play with anyone, he wanted to be left alone.  However, he plays well with many other kids including his 3 year old sister all the time without exhibiting the same behavior.  As he played in the room, with me sitting right there, there was a fear in his eyes.  You could see it.  I am not sure that I will take him back into the room.

 

To him, the room is an orphanage.
To everyone else, the room is a fun, brightly painted toddler room with lots of toys for kids to play with.
He sees many kids running around with a couple of nannies there to help, and a need to protect himself.
Everyone else sees a good ratio of caring staff taking great care of all the kids while the parents are in church.
To Yosef, it is chaos.  It is a reminder of his orphaned childhood.  It is where people pick you up to change your diaper, and feed you but otherwise leave you to fend for yourself.

It is better not to continually dwell on the past, but sometimes it is a good reminder of the trauma that he has endured as we try to lovingly raise him.

Making Progress

It is crazy that we have been home for over three months now.  The time is flying and just doesn't seem to slow down.  This last month has been full of kids birthday's.  Eyerus turned 12, Mahlet turned 8 and Capri turned 3.
The kids are all doing really well, considering they have only been apart of our family for a few months now.  We are progressing like we would have expected.  Their English skills are improving daily.  Mahlet has almost forgotten all of her Amharic.  We hosted a friend for dinner a week ago from Addis Ababa and he was trying to converse with her, but she couldn't remember many words.  I would like them to be able to retain Amharic, but with her inability to read and write it, and her refusal to try and speak it to Eyerus, she is losing it quick.  Eyerusalem had learned how to read and write it so we have her reading her Bible in Amharic with the hopes that she will be able to retain it.
We have had a few challenging days lately that reminded us of the hardships that our kids have endured and that there is still a lot of adjusting and healing that needs to take place.  However, the hard days are becoming less and less frequent and good days are taking their places.  It has been an adjustment for all of us as we learn to be a family together.  I have spend some time this morning looking back on some home videos from ET and reminiscing our time there.  One of the things that is glaringly different now compared to only a few months ago is the posture and attitudes that our kids have.  They now stand tall, are proud, and have smiles plastered across their faces (most of the time.)
It is so awesome to see the change in their lives right before us.
Both Eyerus and Mahlet have now learned how to swim and going to be like fishes before the summer is over.
God is good.  He continues to provide for us. 
It was awesome to meet with our friend from Addis last week.  Heather and I continue to miss ET and our friends there.  I hope that some day we can get back.  The pastor from the church we were apart of in Addis posted some pictures recently of hundreds of street kids being fed, inside the little property of the church.  It was awesome to see the church going strong, and ministering to the people there.  I miss being able to worship with our brothers and sisters in another language.  It is an experience that everyone should have at some point.

2 months now! What?

I can't believe that we have been home for over two months now.  I have been meaning to write this post a few weeks ago, but have simply not found the time.  Life is busy now (that is an understatement.)  Here is an update on how things are going.
Tonight, Heather is out for a much needed girls night.  So, I Adam had the kids since this afternoon.  It went really well. It is not the first time, but by far the easiest.  The difference was Yosef.
A couple of hours ago, I gave him a bottle, put on his pajamas and laid him in bed.  Awake.  With Capri in the same room.  Awake.  About 20 minutes later, both were sound asleep.  If you don't grasp how awesome that feat is then you must re-read it:)  No really.  This is Yosef coming so far along.  For the first month and a half he had to be strapped to Heather's back, walked around while she cleaned for about an hour to two hours.  Then, sometimes, hours after the other kids were asleep, he might fall asleep still strapped to her back.  I would not ever really be able to do it.  If we put him in the crib to let him cry it out, (like our other 3 kids) a look of terror would come across his face and the screaming would start, keeping us from doing that.  He would be completely scared to death.  Scared that he was being left again.  Now, he is no longer as scared.  He starts to have a little whimper of a cry, just to check that we are still around, we tell him to go to sleep and then he quiets down again, confident that we are in the next room still.  Tonight, his momma is gone and it was I who gave him the confidence to be able to sleep.  He knows that momma is coming home, and he knows that I am his dad.  This too has not happened overnight.  For weeks, he really did not like me at all.  And to be fully open and transparent, I did not like him either.  I know, it is really awful to say and I realize that.  It is however, the ugly truth of adoption.  Adoption is not this blissful thing.  It is ugly, yet beautiful.  Before going to ET I wasn't sure how adoption could be ugly.  Now I know.  The ugliness comes from seeing the insides of my thoughts and attitudes.
When I come home from work now, Yosef is one of the first ones to run to the door to greet me, give me a hug and tell me that he loves me. :)  It is getting beautiful.
Mahlet is doing amazing.  She is progressing well in school.  She loves it and works hard at it.  She always has a smile on her face.  I love seeing a smile on a face of a child that months ago, could not ever muster up a smile.   She is a great helper around the house.  She does a lot of the cleaning and she is the one that hangs up most of our laundry now.  We can now laugh about the attitude that she gave us in the first month we had custody of her.  Yesterday, we asked her if she remembered how awful she was to us?  She did.  We tell her that she has gotten SO much better and is so much easier to have around.  She is fitting into the family like she has always been a part of it.
Eyerusalem is progressing as well.  School is going much better with her than it was in Ethiopia.  Most of the time she puts effort into it.  Her English skills are improving and she is learning tons.  She really has learned her role as sister to Yosef instead of Mom.  She is really doing well with that.  Yesterday, was the first day that Eyerus actually gave me a "real" hug.  I had to ask for it and initiate it, but it was the first time that she put her arms around me and showed me that she can hug.  Eyerus turns 12 tomorrow and with that makes her an official pre-teen bringing all the drama with it:)  I am not sure that I could ever really be ready for it.  For her birthday we got her a pet lamb about a week ago.  She is going to raise it for a pet and for wool so that she can knit with it.  She is super excited and is out working with the lamb and goats daily.  It is nice to have a good helper outside.  We tease Eyerus about the attitude that she had in Ethiopia as well and she laughs along with us.  She is going to try out for a part in the kids musical at church this week and we are excited that she and Mahlet gets to do this.
We are blessed by how well things are going.  We are super busy, and probably always will be.  Somethings just don't get done anymore.  God is Good.  Thanks for the continued prayers for our family.  Thanks for all of those that have come along side of us in this journey.

One month home!

Wow! I can't believe that it was only one month ago that we were landing at the SFO airport, dog tired, trying to hold things together for just a little bit longer.  Towing 6 kids along, over thousands of miles, a couple of layovers, and 20 hours of flying, I had done really, really well.  That is until the end.  There was a one hour delay in Frankfurt that we knew would cause our trip to be one hour too long.  Sure enough, we were right.  The last hour was just bad.  It started when one of our children waited until our lunch (the fourth lunch in the same day) came that she told me she had to go pee.  I had just asked her minutes before.  When we were in the bathroom, one of our other daughters spilt my and her food.  It was pasta.  With marinara.  All over my seat and the ground.  I covered it up with one of the free blankets and just figured that the airline was stupid to feed a child red pasta while flying.  By the time that we landed, I think that 3 of our children were crying.  Full blown crying.  Some jerk and his family cut in front of us in immigration, making us the very last ones there.  Yosef had a BAD poopy diaper, yet we can't just bypass immigration.  It took 45 minutes for the officials to process all of our paperwork, while the kids tried to sit quietly on the floor.  By the time we got to our baggage, all 10 of our bags were sitting on the side of the conveyer belt together and were the only bags in site.  The place was very empty.  We all had to go to the bathroom by this point.  (Remember the diaper and the red pasta incident.)  While the kids were going to the bathroom, Heather was somehow able to help all of them change and brush their teeth, to try to get rid of that "we've been traveling for a day and a half" kind of smell.  I put all of our bags on 2 carts, it was like I was constructing the great pyramids.  It was a thing of beauty, perfectly balanced, with all of our kids carry-ons, tied to the sides.  Two carts, one for me, and one for Heather, to eliminate the kids fighting over who gets to crash it into people.  We were all trying to put on our happy faces, trying to hide the fact that we were tired, grumpy, hungry and ready to be home.  It was at this point that the customs officer directed us the the conveyer belt for ALL of our bags to be X-rayed.  Now, I have never had to X-ray my bags on my way home, they just ask a few questions and sent you right around the machines, out to freedom.  I just looked at him, as we were the only ones around.  I stared blankly at him and said, "Really! Really!  You are going to make me disassemble all of these bags and put them through that stupid machine with all of my kids here?"  Well, yes he was.  Twenty minutes later, knowing that our family might not even be waiting outside anymore, I quickly reconstructed my luggage pyramid.  I moved 5 feet and then it all came crashing to the ground!  It was at this point that I lost it.  I am not proud of the way that I acted and I am not proud of the attitude that developed at this point.

I tell this story, for a couple of reasons.  One, because now that it is over I can laugh at it.  Two, because there have been many instances like this one over the last month that I am just not proud of.

I know that God is using these difficult times to work on me.  To draw me closer to Him.  It is in these times that I have to fully rely on God.  I have to give Him my problems, and stress and let Him work through me.  I don't have enough patience for our kids right now.  But, God does.  He gives it to me.  I don't have enough grace for our kids right now.  But, God does.  He gives that to me as well.  I have repeatedly failed, miserably at times.  However, God continues to give me the energy and the patience and the love that I need for all of our children.  It is right when I really need it that He reminds me of the past that our kids have had.  The past that I would not ever wish for anyone.  The past that involves losing their parents and having to be adopted.  Getting taken away from their own country, culture, language, foods and getting plopped into the overly abundant material world of the silicon valley.  I remember why Christ led us to them in the first place.

This month has had many ups and downs.  Many tantrums, by all of the kids.  Many laughs and giggles and excitement from them as well.  We are all adjusting to our new normal.  It feels normal now having 6 kids.  When one or two kids are napping or outside, it feels too easy.  We are learning more and more about our 3 new kids.  They are getting more and more used to us.  Yosef, is probably the hardest one that is going to attach to us and is a few months behind in the process than his sisters.  Attachment is a process.  It takes time.  It is difficult, very difficult at times.  It takes a conscious decision to choose love.    The kind of love that only comes from the Holy Spirit.  It doesn't come from within me.  I know.  There have been too many times that it is just not there.

How would I sum up this month.  Progress.  We are making progress, trying to do the best that we can. We are giving everything that we've got right now.  Each night, after the kids are in bed (early) we crash.  We wind down so that we can do it all again tomorrow.  I wouldn't ask for anything else.  I love our new normal.  I love our new family of 8.  I love seeing how Christ is working in us.

Two weeks home already!

I can't believe that we have been home for 2 weeks already. Wow, the time has gone by fast. So here is a recap on the last 2 weeks and how we are progressing at this point.

Day one started out at 6am which was really better than expected. We took the kids to Costco that day. We tried to prepare them for it as we described what it was like. They asked us if it was bigger than the Shoa Supermarket in Addis? Which is big by ET standards but barely bigger than most truck stops along the highway. We laughed and told them to just wait. There have been a lot of wide eyes and tons and tons of questions. I have to continually remind myself that the questions really aren't because they are trying to be annoying but really because they don't know what an RV is or what a Home Depot is.

We took them on a trip to San Francisco and went to the zoo, the Golden Gate bridge and Pier 39. They were fine in the big city, and were amazed at the street performers. It was also their first time to see the beach and play in the sand. One of our girls got her shoes wet as she wasn't quick enough to get away from the wave coming at her. Some things you just have to learn on your own.

We re-started school at home on Monday. We took a couple weeks spring break while we traveled and adjusted. However, our girls were getting so bored at home that they kept asking us to start school:) We kept telling them that it was our spring break as well and they needed to go and play outside. I think that it was a good thing for them to get bored and want to be doing school again as it was getting very difficult to get it done with good attitudes in ET.

Eyerusalem learned how to ride a bike by the 2nd day that we were home. Mahlet has learned how to ride one as well, but is afraid at this point to let me take off the training wheels. Yosef is now very comfortable in our house and runs around causing havoc everywhere he goes.

We have overcome many food issues! This is awesome, since with six kids we really can't be Burger King and give it to them their way everyday. About a week ago, Mahlet still would not even taste her slow-cooked chicken, drenched in BBQ sauce that sat on her plate. So I finally said, "Okay, what kind of dessert will it take? What do you want bad enough that you are willing to put 2 bites of that chicken in your mouth and eat it without throwing it back up?" Ice cream with chocolate syrup it was! She literally has gone months with no dessert while the other kids have all gotten stuff, that she just didn't care about. We also have constantly told her that the meat here in the US is different than the meat in ET. (It is... mostly.) She has now eaten chicken and pork! She is still the last one at the table, but at least she is eating it. Yesterday, we all got tired of waiting for her that we got up, finished the dishes and she was still eating!

We also have used the same argument with Eyerus. She claims that her b-day is on Sept. 29th, which would make her 12. However, her birth certificate is for June 7th, which makes her still 11. We are going to keep her young for as long as possible, so we aren't going to change it. As she often argued about it, (for sure, she is a pre-teen) I told her that it must be because they use a different calendar in ET than we do in the US, so we are both right:) So 11 she will remain, at least for a few more months.

We have also seen a huge improvement over the last 3 months in their English. It is really encouraging to see. Yosef has about a 20 word English vocabulary now as well. Though he still grunts and screams for everything he wants.

The kids went to the dentist today. I have not heard yet how that went, but my guess is not good. Really, really, really not good. It is a shame the sugar and the sodas that are given to kids in an orphanage. Especially without dental care, it is just ruining the kids teeth. I really think that the gifts that are given to the kids for a short term smile really cause a lot more damage than people realize. I do mean all the gifts, but that is for another day.

When we went to ET we did not think that we would have been there for 4 months, but I am so glad that we stayed. Had we known that it would be that long, we probably would have thought that staying was out of the question, but it was so, so worth it. We had a great time staying there. We stayed at the Ethiopia Guest House and they took great care of us. I would highly recommend it to any adoptive families going to ET. The staff there is amazing and really has become our friends. We definitely felt at home.

We have started to find our new normal. That normal is LOUD, and CRAZY but it is normal now. The other day, we only had the "old" three girls playing inside. Yosef was napping, and the older girls were out riding bikes. Heather and I both thought, "this used to be hard????" It just feels normal now for us to count 6 kids everywhere we go, and for everyone to do a double take and then say, "you have your hands full." Someone asked me how we do it, my reply was, "I have learned to count quicker:)"

Truthfully, God and His sovereign grace is abounding on us. He is giving us patience and love more so than we ever could have thought. We really did not experience much jet lag. Things are going along well. We still have our share of issues, though the tantrums don't last as long as they used to. Yosef is starting to let me hold him a little without screaming the entire time. We are starting to have a much better time between him and I. He has never had a father figure around, or even a male figure. All his nannies were women and it is really hard for him to get used to having a male around. It is understandable, but difficult.

As we started school yesterday, I laid out the rules for our kids. Rule #1 is that we glorify God in ALL that we do. We want our kids to get an education that is well rounded and that is focused on what is truly important.

I have been reflecting on this whole process and I am amazed as I look back and see ALL the ways that the Holy Spirit has been working. He has been leading us, keeping us focused on the Almighty God and living our lives in a way that brings Him glory. The Holy Spirit is still leading our lives, He is still directing us. Our story is not yet over.... I look forward to where He leads us next.

How should we give?

I have been wrestling with the idea of giving a lot lately. I am not sure that I have really landed anywhere, but I really question how we as a family give things away now. Being in ET has really brought the question to the forefront on numerous occasions for us.

There are three books that have really changed my philosophy on giving lately. I read, "When Helping Hurts," a while ago and I am currently reading, "Toxic Charity." Both of these really question the way that I have done things in the past. Also, I am continually reading the Bible, which address giving on numerous different levels.

Giving should help and empower. However, often it doesn't do that. Also, as Christians our giving should really have a focus on furthering God's kingdom.

I think that one of the best ways to accomplish this is by supporting and giving to different missionaries that are working on the front lines, spreading the Gospel and helping communities more holistically.

Another way of giving is by supporting peoples real businesses. Though it has cost us a ton to stay here in ET for so long, one of the things that makes it easier to swallow the cost is knowing where the money is going. By staying in this guest house we are supporting, 2 guards, 2 cooks, 2 cleaners, 3 receptionists. We also have supported a driver fairly often. As we go to the local markets and bakeries and fruit stands we are helping support the community in real ways, by purchasing things from them locally. I know that one of our guards used to rummage through the garbage dump prior to getting this job. I love knowing that I am helping support a secure job that helps his daughter go to school and have enough food to eat. Paying for this guest house is one of the best ways we can support and get to know people on a longer basis.

I don't like hand-outs. The hard part is knowing when to give to someone asking and when not to. It is not always wise to help sustain someones begging. I guess that is where we have to pray for wisdom and guidance on how to handle the different situations.

Like I said, I really haven't landed anywhere. It is a question that keeps confronting me lately though and has been on my mind a lot.

I have a long way to go.

For the sake of honesty, this is how selfish and lazy I (Adam) can be....

I always carry a bunch of 1 birr notes in my pocket to hand out to those in need and those begging any time I go out. I always make sure to have some, as I want to give them freely to those in need, and I often find someone that is begging. (Though, there really aren't a ton in the are that we are living) For comparison, it is 17 birr to $1. Which makes a birr about 5 or 6 cents. 1 Birr is enough to be able to purchase a good sized roll or a small banana. I rarely hand out more than a few birr in a day, yet it is considerably more than the average amount that the beggars receive. I give it to them in the name of Jesus and keep on my way. I am not really breaking the bank here, and I know that. However, it is not meant to be a sustainable way of living for those in need, it really is to just help them with their next meal.

Today, I was walking home, after buying some bread at the bakery and I saw a man sitting on the ground, on the other side of the road. He had his jacket lying on the dirt, and a couple of coins sitting on the jacket. He was obviously begging, though he did not specifically ask me for anything. So I figured, well, he is on the other side of the road and he really didn't see me or ask me for anything so I don't need to go and give him anything. So I didn't. I still can't believe I would be so selfish with 5 cents! It is God's money in the first place, not mine! I continued on my way totally ignoring him. He was across the street, but I was basically walking in the middle of the street and the street is smaller than a normal sized residential street. Really, it is basically an alley. He was about 10' from me!

I kept walking. My hand in my pocket feeling the 1 birr coins jingling around as I walked.

My inner voice was nagging at me as I kept coming up with lame excuses why I shouldn't and couldn't go back to him now that I am so far past him.

After about two blocks, the nagging inside of my head finally won and I turned around. I made my way back to him, dropped a coin on his dirty jacket and blessed him. As I type this, the story of the good samaritan keeps coming to mind. Which one was I? Not the one I should be.

I have a long way to go. Jesus lead me.

Our children's home....

Let me preface this story with one thing. I could not have made this up or embellished it, even if I tried!

We took a trip with all of our kids today to go to Girge. Girge is a small village area of Addis Ababa, which is where Eyerusalem and Mahlet grew up. Their house is about 1/2 mile off the road, on a very rocky and hilly trail. It was kinda like hiking. There were houses all around, trash was everywhere and the village was full of people. As we arrived we obviously stood out seeing as very few firenge's (white people) travel into the neighborhood of Girge. (Though I think we stand out everywhere!) Even as we got out of the car, family friends came to greet our kids. One of the ladies came back to meet us an hour later with five or six old photos of our kids which we treasure!

We made our way to the house, with a trail of people behind us. Their house is in a very hilly area, I lost track of how many times Capri tumbled over due to the uneven terrain. It is a mud house, about 8' by 8' with a tin roof. It was very basic, four walls and a roof, but I think that it mostly kept them out of the weather. Inside of the house, Eyerusalem started to have a very heated discussion with a few of the neighbors and we really weren't sure what was going on as nobody was translating for us. We found out later that she was mad that someone else was living inside of the house. (They have been out of it for almost a year now.)

After many greeting and pictures, we started to head back to the car and were saying our goodbyes. We walked a little ways down the trail when the man Eyerus was having the discussion with, invited us into his home. We came to find out that this man, in his early 40's took really good care of our kids, and was a very good family friend. By this time, it was almost lunch, the smaller kids were hungry and it was getting hot. Our driver was waiting and we were ready to go get something to eat. Heather, and our smaller kids were actually about 50 yards ahead of me and had to return to accept the invitation. Eyerus, asked how much time we had, and I told her 10 minutes knowing that it would be at least 30 minutes after coffee or tea.

We graciously accepted the invitation and headed inside the mud house. This one though had a couch and a couple of chairs. Almost as if they had already planned it, piping hot tea was brought out. As a non tea drinker it was very good. I am sure it was loaded with sugar! They offered the smaller girls some, and as I was declining for them, London grabbed a cup and started to drink. I am hoping and praying that she doesn't get sick. I finished my cup, had another and then drank Geneva's cup. At about this time, they brought out a plate full of bread. It was good bread, but would have been nice to slab it with butter or something. Then, they asked if we would take injera. Sure, why not? I know that Eyerus and Mahlet wanted some. So, a HUGE plate of injera with some fixings was brought out as well. We ate a good lunch, our girls were stuffed, (all except Geneva and Capri, who still don't like injera) More tea was served, and my cup was rinsed in between servings in a pot of water that I pray won't give me the runs.

After the 3rd cup of tea, we got down to business.... The girls house was apparently owned by their mother, who is now deceased. So, we were asked if we would like to live in it right now instead of paying for the guest house! Wow! Think of all the money that we could save! I was trying to make sure that I was really understanding what was going on since Eyerus was the one translating what the friend was saying. We politely declined stating that we are already set up at our guest house and we would be leaving Ethiopia soon.

It gets better... Since our kids mother died, she technically left the house to them. Now that we are their parents, it has apparently become our asset! WE ARE HOME OWNERS HERE IN ADDIS!!!!! Who knew???? So, we were asked what we want done with all the money that they have been collecting in rent. It rents for 150 Birr a month which is about $10. The money has been put into a savings account and they have been waiting for the kids to return (years down the road) to reclaim it. There was discussion for about 10 minutes while we really tried to clarify all that was going on. In the end, we told him that it was a matter of prayer. We told him that right now, we want him to rent it free of charge to street kids who really don't have anywhere else to go. We also directed him to rent it to "positive" widows with kids that might need a place to stay.

We prayed, gave each other blessings and headed out on our way. New homeowners:)

By the way, we got back to our guest house and both I and Eyerusalem told a translator our versions of what happened there and she said that I had the story exactly right, nothing was lost in the translation.

I choose "No Fear"

The popular shirts of the 1990's used to boldly say, "No Fear!" Then, I wore them WAY too much, today I claim it.

At the end of January, three days before I (Adam) was getting ready to return to the US, London got VERY sick. We took her to the clinic after she had a temperature of 105F that was not controlled with Tylenol, Motrin and a cold bath. Luckily, the doctor was able to diagnose her with Typhus. (Which is different than Typhoid fever) Typhus used to be known as jail fever and prior to antibiotics had a mortality rate of almost 50%. Luckily, we had access to antibiotic injections (which were torturous for all involved.) I took her to get her last shot, still with a fever about an hour before I told Heather and the girls goodbye as I left to the airport. It was during a 4 day period, we found out we didn't pass court for Yosef, we weren't submitted to embassy, we had a TON of money stolen and we determined that I had to return to the US.

After doing some research on Typhus we were able to determine that London contracted it via a flea bite (that had bitten a rat) from a very poor area. This poor area, known as Kora is where we go to church. Typhus takes 3 weeks to incubate and doing our math we realized that this was exactly when we decided to take our girls to do some home visits in this area, to pray with and bless those that never can make it to church. London got bit by fleas in the process, as Satan was already planning an attack against us. Prior to going to Kora, I made a conscious decision to take my children into the area. I recognized and knew there might be some risks, but I knew that this is where the Lord was leading us. So we went. The night that I realized how sick London was due to our being there, it made me sick. I brought her in there. I brought her into this spiritual war and she paid a price for it. I stayed up really late that night, praying into the night, refusing to let Satan win. To God be the glory in ALL things.

This coming Monday, we have been given the opportunity to go back to the Kora village and encourage and support some of the widows there. We are going to the Mission Ethiopia area where the women work and make necklaces to sell, so that they can support their families, give their kids an education, and support more of the neighborhood all around them, in the name of Jesus Christ. You can see a video of where we are going HERE! I encourage you to watch it. It took us 5 hours to download here and I am glad that I did. I just showed it to all of our kids. They are all super excited to go and visit the women and see how the necklaces are made.

I am not hesitant to take our kids back there on Monday. I trust in God's sovereign provision and I trust that He cares for my family more than I do. I will not let Satan win. In Christ, I have "No Fear." I will however, go with more prayer than before. I am excited about this opportunity to go into this village again and see Christ work, especially amongst my children. I trust that my family has been and will continue to be covered in prayer through our time here. This is one of the ways that you can pray for us. Another BIG prayer request is that on Thursday, the girls uncle is supposed to go to the Embassy for an interview and we are hoping to be cleared on that day. This will allow us to make our April 3rd flights home!!!

If anyone would like one of the magazine necklaces or clay necklaces seen in the video, send us a message and we will buy them and bring them back for you to buy. The cost is $10 each. Also, specify which kind you would like, clay or magazine.

Entitled

Entitled: A verb; to stake or put claim to something.

One of, if not the hardest thing that we have dealt with in our adoption of two older girls has been entitlement issues. (The other top two issues have been school issues and food issues.) I think that it is so hard for Heather and I to deal with as we just don't really understand it all. So, I have been reflecting on entitlement.

How is it that our girls who came from an orphanage without even their own pair of clothes and just a half full backpack of random items, (such as a 1/2 deck of cards and a few pictures) can now demand SO much. They each had a suitcase of items waiting for them at our guesthouse upon their arrival, including a pair of new shoes. Now, every time we walk past a shoe store we are bombarded with questions about why we won't go and buy them 5 more pairs of shoes! They feel entitled to more. We have given them everything for nothing in return. Nothing that they have done deserves the gifts that they have received, the love that they have been given and the opportunities that will await them. We choose them anyway.

We know not to expect our new kids to feel thankful or grateful, but it is incredibly difficult when you feel like you have now given them more than they need and yet still they are not satisfied with it. They demand more. They might say thank you in the moment, but the moment is fleeting.

I really could go on and on about different entitlement issues that we have dealt with. Trust me, it has been a HUGE issue.

However, I have come to realize that as difficult as it is to deal with, we are ALL guilty of feeling entitled. We feel entitled to:

The right to peace.

The right to prosperity.

Our civil rights.

The right to fast internet.

The right to freedom of speech.

The right to worship how and whom we want.

The right to three meals a day. (at nice places)

The right to take a nice vacation.

The right to buy the newest phones.

The right to have the bigger house.

Etc, etc, etc, etc.

We (myself included) feel so entitled to many, many things. Many of these issues come up and have to be dealt with when you are in a foreign land with a different culture.

As a follower of Christ I have to continually remind myself that I am not entitled to these things. I need to continually re-evaluate my priorities and what is important in my life. I have to often remind myself that I am not entitled to receive any of these things. There is nothing that I have, nor nothing that I can do that earns or deserves the love of Christ. Yet, He lavishly pours it out on me.

Titus 3:4-7

"(4)But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Saviour appeared, (5) he saved us, NOT because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to HIS own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, (6) whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Saviour, (7) so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life."

I have done NOTHING to earn his grace, nothing!

I am entitled to NOTHING!

I pray that I can remember this, and that I can teach my children it as well:)

Adoption thoughts...

We have heard just about every question there is when it comes to our adoption and we really want to be an open book so that God will be glorified in our lives and what He is doing in us.

Here are some of the questions, and answers:

What are you thinking? Didn't you already have three kids?

Yeah... sometimes Heather and I ask ourselves this question. Having a family of 6 kids, four of whom are adopted never really was a part of "our" plan. We for SURE have a crazy life now! Actually, our lives felt crazy before this adoption. We felt like there was no way we can do this. (we still can't apart from Christ) Though this never was our plan, it was God's plan all along. As we look back towards the ways that He brought us here it is clear that this was His plan for us. So, what were we thinking? We want to follow Jesus Christ with our whole lives. For us, this meant adopting these three beautiful kids. Who knows what His plan is for you, it is not likely adopting three kids. Though I will say, to give Christ your life, means that you give Him your plans and His plans might entail adopting three kids. :)

If we could do it over again different would we?

Again, this question is fairly similar. The reality is that we can't. So, there is no use in wasting time thinking that we could do it different. However, the answer is a resounding NO! We would not want to do it any different. It was incredibly hard getting into a taxi, leaving 5 children with Heather, two of whom were really sick, in a foreign country. Saying goodbye to them and watching them all cry so much was by far, the most difficult thing Heather and I have had to endure. The hardest part was really not knowing when I would return. This time that we have had here in ET now has been an incredible time for our family. It has allowed us to show our girls how much we love them, a small version of the love that Christ has for us, his adopted children. We, (Heather especially) have been able to bond with them here in their own surroundings, in an area that is somewhat familiar for them, before whisking them across the earth to a place called California. I don't want to do the time apart again though, (I have let God know that many times:) Our time apart allowed Heather's parents to be able to come and help and it allowed me to be able to work some overtime to help cover some of the increased costs. If we had known months ago that we would be here for 4 months total, I am not sure that we would have done it. This is where following Jesus has really come in. We haven't been able to see the path laid out far ahead of us, but only one step at a time. So we have taken that one step at a time, and He continues to lead us in the right path.

Is adoption hard?

HECK YEAH IT IS HARD! I don't want to sugar coat anything, encouraging others to adopt without really knowing what is in store. It is incredibly hard to love someone who doesn't appreciate it. (Once again, kinda like Jesus does for us) Our girls don't trust us fully yet, they still aren't sure that we won't just take them back to the orphanage. Who can blame them? We have to constantly ask for grace, patience and for an increased amount of love. Our girls are 11 and 7, yet emotionally they are like 5 and 3. Educationally, they are around the 1st grade and kindergarten levels. Add that to the language barrier, and the fact that they don't trust our love yet. This makes things challenging at best. Tantrums are the routine. Even after a couple of months, we both feel like adopting older children and bringing them into our home is considerably harder than all three times we brought a new born into the home, (with the hourly feedings and everything). Emotionally, and physically it is taxing! The harder it is, the more we realize the deep needs they have and we are honored that God has chosen us to be the ones to meet them. The other day, our 11 year old told Heather how much she appreciated us adopting all three of them and London as well. She said that she is sorry for the hard times that she gives us. They do bring a smile to our faces. Someday, hopefully, she will start to act out that appreciation:)

You guys are amazing! (This is mostly in the form of a statement as opposed to a question)

Ummm, No! We are not. We lose our tempers with them, we yell at them, we often find ourselves short on patience. We are doing our best, but we are not doing anything super "good" or super "Christian". We are just doing what we have been asked to do. That is all. We NEVER would have done this on our own accord. We only do this, as we try to become more and more a follower of Christ, and learn what that means. Sometimes, that means that He is going to want us to do things that we would otherwise think is crazy. Never, ever ever does Jesus claim that following Him is easy. In fact, He tells us that it is hard, that it is the road less traveled. This is where we cling to Him, and have joy that He is ALL we need.

There have been plenty of other questions, but maybe I will answer those at another time. For now, we love the life that we have been called to. It may be one crazy, hard life right now, but it is our life and we love it! Please don't think that I am complaining one bit. We knew what we were getting into, (mostly.) As I once again get to listen to the morning prayers in the distance, my girls are all going to wake up in about 30 minutes, come downstairs for breakfast and find me sitting here waiting for them!! Last night, two hours before I got here, they sent me messages on Skype telling me that I need to just get on a plane right now and get here:) Well, it worked!

67 hours!!!!

67 hours until I will be arriving in Addis Ababa at our guest house! I. Can't. Wait. It seems like it has been forever since I boarded a plane and flew back home, leaving my family and wife behind. I am super excited. I am fully packed, house is clean and I am ready to go. Just one more day of work and then I leave right after getting off duty:)

I miss my wife.

I miss my kids.

I miss Ethiopia.

I miss the sights and smells.

I miss the coffee ceremony.

I miss the Ethiopian people.

I miss the crazy driving.

I miss the laid back attitudes.

I miss going for walks to get a 25 cent coffee

I miss 30 cent french fries.

I miss being able to walk to the fruit market

I miss the simpleness of it all.

I miss the roadside stores.

I miss the music.

I miss the church.

I miss the injera.

I miss the cold flimsy pancakes in the morning (okay, not really:)

I miss it ALL

I can't wait to go back!!!

We just bought return tickets for all 8 of us for April 3rd. Please pray with us that this date will work. It will be another $2500 or so if it doesn't :( Also, we have a birth family interview set up on the 22nd of March. Please pray that this is all that the embassy requires and they clear us at this time (for ALL 3 children!) May God be glorified in all things we do!

Thank You

One of the hardest things about being here in Ethiopia is the lack of communication that I am able to have with friends and family back at home. It seems like I am constantly fighting trying to be on the internet. Sometimes it feels like a losing battle.

Most nights, we do not have the internet. I'm not sure if our guest house doesn't pay for the "super speed" internet, therefore, it's too slow for us at night (b/c so much of Ethiopia is on the internet), or if Satan is trying to prevent me from feeling connected with loved ones back at home. Either way, it is discouraging. We almost always have internet during the day. But, as I am sure you can imagine, my time on the computer is VERY limited during the day. Most of the time I do get to sit down for a few minutes to log onto the internet, I am listening to crying, whining, screaming, fighting, or all of the above while I try to catch up with life back at home. By the end of the day, I practically fall into bed after I talk to Adam for a few minutes (if I am even able to do that). Many nights I just message him on skype, and these messages "pend" until the internet eventually comes back on at some point during the night, and then they get sent.

All this to say, I am SO very sorry for my delay in saying THANK YOU to those of you who sent beautiful birthday cards and sweet notes for my birthday!! I truly felt SO blessed to know that so many people back at home are lifting us up in prayer as we get thru our adoption process! The night before my birthday (Ethiopia time), the staff here at the guest house, surprised my with a birthday party! Adam had ordered a cake and roses! It was SO much fun! Then, on my actual birthday in Ethiopia, we celebrated by spending the day at the Sheraton! It was such a fun day! The girls LOVE to go here, as we spend the whole day swimming in their pool! It really is nice. When you walk into the water, it's like walking into the ocean at the beach, as it gets gradually deeper. But, it is not like the beach in Santa Cruz, more like the beach in Hawaii:) as the water is very warm! They have the kids area sectioned off, so it is perfect for my five girls who don't know how to swim. My parents gave me the best gift, a BREAK from all of my kids. Some other adoptive mommas met us at the pool as well, so we all ditched our kids and snuck inside for a cup of coffee! It was such a treat:)! This was probably my first real break since coming to Ethiopia, and I enjoyed every minute of it.

I enjoyed all of your cards over the course of three days. Reading your cards was the highlight of the days end for me, so I wanted to make it last:). With my kids sound asleep, I would hunker down in my bed and just enjoy the quiet moments of reading these words from home!

Having so many people praying for us, is the ONLY reason I am still surviving here in Ethiopia. When Adam left, I was sure that I was NOT the strong woman that everybody kept saying I was. God has given me the strength to get thru each day though. And, He has stretched me in more ways than I ever thought possible.

Thank you SO much for your continued prayers! I am definitely feeling them. While I definitely need prayer all day, I would specifically love prayer around 7:00, bedtime. This is 8:00am California time. It is around this time of the day that I just feel like I have run out of steam. I want everyone to go to bed, and honestly, I want them to go to bed NOW! Lately the girls have been taking over an hour to fall asleep, which means that they wake up cranky and tired. Capri is often the last to fall asleep and is always the first to wake up. With no nap in the middle of the day, you can imagine how fun she is around 4:00pm:). Please pray for patience for me during this time. Pray that God would sustain me beyond 7:00, and that I would be patient in waiting for the girls to fall asleep (so that I can have "me" time:).

Thank You again so much for all your love and prayers!!

Update!

It has been really hard for either Heather, or I to update anything here on the blog. The internet on the other side of the world in Ethiopia is awful. Even worse over the last couple of weeks. So Heather has been unable to post anything. My main internet is through our ipad, and once again, it won't let me post anything for some reason. So I have had a lot on my mind that hopefully I will posting in the next few weeks. Some thoughts on adoption and life in general in Ethiopia.

However, I wanted to give an update on our status.

I, Adam came home on Jan 31st. Right now it is my plan to return to ET around the middle of March or so. The day that I left, we finally passed court for our boy, Yosef. It took about 7 weeks or so for him to pass. He is still in the transition home as we are really uneasy to taking custody of him yet as his case seems more difficult. We have taken custody of our two girls, Eyerusalem and Mahlet, as of Jan 4th. It has been an awesome time for us to be there in ET getting to know our girls. So many times, we have been able to use a translator to get to the root of different issues. Also, it is more of a familiar area for the girls as they learn how to be a part of our family.

All three of our kids were submitted to the US embassy at the same time last Wed. The embassy is supposed to take around 10 days to decide what they are going to do with our case. There is a chance (albeit SMALL) that they could just clear us and request an interview with us. There is a MUCH greater chance that they will schedule an interview first with the distant uncle who relinquished the kids. This will likely take another month or so. There is also hopefully a very, very small chance that our case could be sent to Nairobi to be investigated which could then take who knows how long. Right now, we are hoping and praying that we will ALL come home as a family of 8 around the end of March.

Here are some ways to pray for us.

- Obviously the whole embassy issue.

- Heather and our 3 other girls visas are all expiring in a couple of weeks and they are going to have to go renew it, hopefully.

- Heather is T.I.R.E.D. Thankfully, her parents are staying with her right now, but this time of us being apart is really wearing on both of us, especially her. The kids are draining every little bit of energy she has.

- For Heather as she parents 5 of our children right now. Though we wouldn't change a thing, our new girls are HARD! Our 11 year old threw a full-blown tantrum the other morning for over 2 hours because Heather cut her balloon string too small! The nerve of her:) Our 7 year old won't leave Heather's side.

- We know that there are some real deep issues and hurt for our girls and pray as we work through these. During the tantrum, our daughter asked Heather to just hit her so that she would be punished already. :( Heather told her that is not how we do things and she is going to need to learn to talk through some of these issues.

- Pray for our girls English to continue to improve.

- Lastly, pray that our Heavenly Father would continue to sustain us. He has to this point, and we see His hand at work. We trust that He is in each and every situation.

Well, I am sure that is enough for now.

What a fun day!!

This morning we decided to venture out and went for a walk down to the cafe. Each of the girls picked out their own special treat (gotta love having grandma here:), we got a bottle of water to share for the girls and my mom and I each got a macchiato:) Our total bill was 65 birr, which is about $3.50. If we only we could go to Starbucks for as cheap back home!!

The girls have gotten super creative and fun in their play today. After lunch London went upstairs and started "washing clothes". She pulled out our buckets we had bought awhile back, and a bunch of clothes from their closet. She found a few different small containers (like bubble containers, small cups, etc) and was filling those with water in the bathroom, and bringing them over to the big buckets her clothes were in. When Geneva went upstairs and wanted to help, they decided to have a wash bucket and a rinse bucket. Then they would "ring"out their clothes and hang them, (still dripping:) on our balcony. SO cute to watch them:)

After they tired of this they decided to put their swimming suits on and brought the buckets and a bunch of empty water bottles downstairs for water play. They have been wanting to go swimming SO BADLY! I think this satisfied that desire, at least for the time being.

While the girls were playing outside, I made some oatmeal cookies, and they all REALLY enjoyed fresh baked cookies.

Now it is just after 4:00pm, they have started a video, and are watching that as we begin dinner preparations.

Best day we have had in a LONG time!! So much giggling and laughter; hopefully the beginnings of friendships being built in our house today!

Hard goodbye, but help is on it's way!!!!

I HATE goodbyes. Always have. I cry, I sob, and I dread saying goodbye. This weekend I have been thinking non stop about saying goodbye to Adam. I knew that I would be hard for me. What I didn't anticipate was how hard it would be for my girls. They each have their own unique way of grieving. The common thread among all of them though, was that they were sobbing. Adam's car was set to pick him up at 7:30pm. The girls usually go to bed at 7:00. I thought it would be easier for them to say goodbye, and then put them to bed.

Adam started his goodbyes with Mahlet. Her way of dealing with grief is to ignore it. She did everything she could to NOT say goodbye to Adam. She barely gave him a hug, and tried to act as silly as possible when Adam trying to give her a hug. Within minutes we found her sobbing on Adam's pillow. Then Adam said goodbye to London. Her way of dealing with grief is fight it. The whole time Adam was hugging her, she couldn't look at him. She knew that if she did, she would start crying. She was whimpering until we got in bed, and then she was sobbing. Then Adam said goodbye to Eyerus. Her way of dealing with grief is to give in to it. She sat on Adam's lap, and just started sobbing immediately. Then Adam said goodbye to Capri. She's only 2, so we are not sure how much she really understands. She was laughing up until we waved Adam's car goodbye, then she decided to join in and just started sobbing as well. Then Adam said goodbye to Geneva. She grieves long and slow, just like her momma:). She has been saying for days how she doesn't want Adam to go. She has been crying for days, and tonight was sobbing immediately.

Finally it was time to put the girls in bed, only nobody wanted to go to bed. Mahlet sobbed again at the thought of going to her own bed, so I let her sleep in my bed. Geneva always starts out in my bed, because she shares a bed with Capri. But, then of course Capri didn't want to sleep in her own bed, so I put her at the foot of my bed. Since everybody else was sleeping in my bed, it didn't seem fair that sick little London should have to sleep by herself. So, we made a spot for London. Eyerus was in her own bed, still sobbing. I had promised her that she could wave goodbye to Adam's car. The other girls I thought for sure would be asleep.

We left the room with everybody crying (except Capri, who was saying "I not crying". When Adam said goodbye to me, I was crying, but not as much for myself, as for my girls. The car finally came, all the girls got out of bed, came to the balcony to wave Adam's car goodbye. By now, every single one of us, including Adam is sobbing.

When Adam's car finally left, the girls and I went back inside and just held each other and sobbed. I HATE goodbyes.

The good news though is, I just skyped my mom. I thought that my parents wouldn't be here for 16 days. But my mom is getting on a plane on SUNDAY!!!! That is less than a week away! Praise God!! Help is on its way:)

Adam is departing.

Tonight, as most of you are waking up, I (Adam) will be getting on a plane to head home.

I have a few concerns about heading home.

- London is still really sick. She is going to get her last round of injections today before I leave, and she is going to be on oral antibiotics for a while still. However, she still barely can walk around and is cranky as ever.

- We have two other kids with colds and I have a wife who has not been feeling well herself.

I know that the staff here at our guest house and friends here will take good care of her. I also fully trust that the Holy Spirit will give Heather the strength, courage, patience, and wisdom as I depart.

My other concern is my returning to America. I was never concerned coming here about the culture-shock. It is the reverse culture-shock of returning to the states that concerns me. I know that it will be hard for me. I feel at home here on this half of the world. There is a peace here for me that I don't have at home. I love where we are. I love the 25 cent coffee's, I love the people, I love Ethiopia. I love Africa.

Don't get me wrong, there are some luxuries that I look forward to that we don't have here. I really look forward to being able to drive my own car. It is hard not being able to just get in a car and drive somewhere.

I will miss a lot here. I will especially miss my wonderful wife and 5 (almost 6) beautiful children . We plan on being apart for at least a month, but with the way things have been going so far, it is likely to be longer.